Switched! The Role Reversals of Men and Women

The roles of men and women have been set in stone since the beginning of time. Men were meant to be the breadwinners, protectors of women and children, providers and supposedly the stronger of the sexes. In recent years however the roles of men and women have changed, if not completely reversed. During and after the feminist movement, as more and more women opted for careers instead of live filled with pearl necklaces, cupcakes, and cleaning. Women became more self reliant, and independent. Gone are the days when women asked their husbands for allowances, and only spent money on the house. Women are now choosing not to get married, not to have children, or even have children on their own.
With this cultural revolution, come the shifting of the roles of women and men. Men are no longer chivalrous, protectors. Instead they have become selfish, conniving, and just plain disgusting. This may sound like just another article from a bitter, angry lonely spinster, but on the contrary, I’m young cute and have no problems getting a date or keeping him interested. My problem is as with many other women, I am just plain tired of men without sense, ambition, goals, manners and to be frank, just don’t know their role.
No longer do men have manners or at least come up with corny lines, but now the most some of us can get are hoots, hollers, “yo ma let me holla at you”, “a yo”, and my personal favorite “psst”. Once on a cold December afternoon on the way back to the airport with heavy luggage in both arms, a fool (for he is not remotely close enough to a man to be called one) waited until I was half way down the block to yell “a yo shorty with the bags come here!”. This fool for some reason either thought he was so dreamy (this fool was fugly) or was dumb enough to expect me to run back to him so that he could engage me in mindless dribble to get in my pants. A real gentleman would have escorted me along my way and offered to help me with my bags (for ultimately the same goal but with a lot more tact). If it’s not brazen classless idiots, its spineless jellyfish men, men who refuse to make the first move, men who expect women to be the aggressor at all times. At first this will seem cute, even endearing, then its becomes annoying. A woman wants to know she is with a real man, not a chump or a push over who will bend at her every whim. Ladies I know you think you want this but trust me it gets old fast. It seems like there are only two extremes, are there any men in the middle?
Now as I write this I hope you are not given the impression that I am not grateful for the movement, it just seems that men are refusing to be men. This leads me to ask, have the roles completely switched? Are women too much like men? While women have always had the capacity, we now also have the legal right to vote, hold office, and maintain successful careers. Many women are bold, strong hard workers who use their intelligence to climb to the top. Some men are intimidated by this. I once dated a man that tried to degrade me because I worked from the bottom up and didn’t grow up with a silver spoon in my mouth as he did. Needless to say the testosterone in me wouldn’t allow it. (Yes women do have testosternone). It seems that there is no way to get around this. If you’re too strong then you want to be a man and its unacceptable. If you’re soft and traditional, then you’re a pushover or a gold-digger. So what’s a girl of the octs to do? I say we keep our rights and force men to go back to acting like men. Make them hold doors, expect them to have manners, and for the sake of all that is right in the world do not constantly come out of our pockets with that “I got it” business, at the very least go Dutch.
At the same time there are men who have taken the term equal and misconstrued it. They now think that because we are equal, that they no longer have to do ANY of the things they used to. Hello!!!!! YOU ARE STILL A MAN! If society still expects us to have children, and take care of the household (and now also have careers), men need to know their purpose! No I’m not saying a woman can’t or should not pay, but all the time, seriously? So to all the fools listening to Neyo think that independent means you never have to come out of pocket, think again. Yes an independent woman has her own and doesn’t need yours, but this doesn’t mean we are going to be your sugar mamas either. So get a job, and get a clue!

Higher Education, Lowered Expectations

The pursuit of higher education has been instilled in us, as the way to success. Young people especially those who grow up without, are encouraged to go to college to make something of themselves. It all seems so simple, college =career. Upon graduation we believe that our degrees will take us just about anywhere. However once we meet the real world, we are dealt a shocking blow. Not only must we compete with thousands of other grads for jobs, but somehow pay off thousands of dollars in student loans.
So you go to temp agencies, and work as receptionists or file clerks making $13 an hour; if you’re lucky you get an entry level position making $29,000/yr. You have 4 roommates to make ends meet and you drive a hooptie. This is not the life you expected to have; all your life you’ve been hoodwinked into believing that a college degree will take you anywhere but the only place its taken you to is into debt. You remember being told to dream big, that the world is at your fingertips, and you remember this while in your tiny already cramped living space. Meanwhile the guy that sits in the token booth makes $20,000 more than you do… did I mention he’s a high school drop out?
Is it me or is anyone else confused? You’ve just spent $60,000 (and still owe $55,000) on a degree in anthropology that you will never get use out of. The economy is a mess, prices for EVERYTHING are getting higher, yet your salary stays the same, not to mention the fact that with all the lay offs there’s a possibility that you will find yourself staring at a pink slip come Friday afternoon.
Once we get out of school, we often have no idea where to go from there. College taught me several things, many of which are only useful for Jeopardy. What college has failed to teach are the basic skills necessary for success. We are not taught how to interview, or even how to create a resume. People who come from poor backgrounds are deluded into thinking that now that they have a college degree they have made it. If I knew then what I know now, college may not have been a second thought for me. For example a great college course would have been office politics. Apparently its not how hard you work but how much butt you can kiss, and laugh at unfunny jokes otherwise you are not a team player (apparently work is supposed to be Comedy Central). College does not teach you how prove your worth without making your boss feel threatened, or how to put up with his or her snide remarks about how low on the totem pole you are.
College also does not teach you how to choose a career that’s right for you. Some saps that come from poor neighborhoods think that they can go to college and somehow give back to their community, myself included. What we are not told is that many people who are in public service (depending on the region you work in), especially the nonprofit world are well to do, whether from growing up with silver spoons in their mouths or having the good sense to have a career in the corporate world before becoming a hippie do-gooder. It is also not about what you know either; its about what who you know. The fact is if you grew up around people who were janitors and fork lift operators it is highly unlikely that you are going to know people who can help you get that executive position. It’s a cycle, no matter how much education you obtain, the moron whose father is the CFO is likely to get the job over you, case and point former president George W. Bush.
So what else is there to do but grin and bear it right? WRONG! Just as anything college is a business. They are to ensure customer satisfaction and give the customer what they paid for. I for one am not satisfied. I think we should be able to return our degrees and ask for a refund! We are stuck in a situation where we just can’t win. In a collaborative effort, we should all mail back our degrees and ask for a refund, and make sure you send them a copy of the receipt… that big fat notice from Sallie Mae!!!!!

Thanks for reading, feel free to post your opinions. You don't have to agree, just think about another perspective. Thanks to all supporters and even the haters. To those who feel the need to disrespect and refuse to open your minds, I have one thing to say to you…KICK ROCKS!